Saying "New Year New Me" is not exactly what I'm aiming for. Sure I have a list of things in mind I could improve on, but overall 2018 was one of the best years of my life. I went from knowing nothing about my future career options to knowing pretty well where I'm going to end up. I surrounded myself by positive and creative people who helped spark my inspiration. However, there is one goal I would like to set for myself. I want to live my life a little more care free, especially on social media. I also hope to help others become a little more open and trusting with the space around them.
Genuine human connection can be so hard to find. A lot of us are so disconnected from the rest of the world and have trouble realizing what's reality and what isn't. For example, I can count all of my close friends on one hand. I'm very lucky and blessed to say that those people are my support system and the people I value most in my life. I can't say that all of my 737 Instagram followers are my closest friends. Awhile ago, I stopped responding my Snapchat streaks as a little experiment (unless I felt there was a genuine conversation going instead of just sending the word "streaks"). Let me say this, having a number next to someones name doesn't really prove anything. It doesn't fulfill me like it does for others. I would get some snapchats saying "respond streaks" or "snap back" and I started to realize that streaks are a way of self validation. It makes us feel good. Some of my closest friends and I right now don't have a streak going. Thats because we don't talk everyday. However, we don't have to talk every single day to prove that we care about each other, we just know. I can't say that I don't have a platform that makes me feel validated. That platform would be Instagram. I love getting likes on my Instagram posts and I love seeing comments from friends and people I haven't talked to in awhile. I love seeing the number in likes go up and don't lie, I know I'm not the only one who has ever downloaded an app like Followers+ to see who has unfollowed me and then deleted the app shortly after (only to re download it a month or so later). I have personally seen my own friends sit with me and struggle over Instagram captions and I've done it too. You don't want to sound too relaxed and you can't put a photo with a quote on it AGAIN right? Why do we care so much? There have been times where I have thought about what would look good on my page or what wouldn't look good on my page. Maybe the photo wouldn't look good on my page or fit on my timeline well. 2018 also taught me that nobody really cares that much. While you may think someone is judging you, I know that they are more focused on how they look and what they're doing. Also if someone is gonna casually sit through your feed and mock you or judge you, they need to re evaluate how they're spending their free time. Keep using your social media, it can be a beautiful thing. Just don't overthink (I'll keep that one in mind the next time I try to delete a cover that had only been posted for 20 minutes hahaha) You are one of a kind. Never forget that. -Kariann
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